Stupidity

I don’t usually aspire to be stupid. My results are mixed.

Now, however, according to a favorite coach, Giacomo Steccaglia, my dancing ambitions require me to be momentarily mindless. Or as he says, "Get stupid."

Why? Because it’s the week before a competition.

Rather than perfect new material or address a nagging backlog of bad habits, it’s time to liberate the brain and let it all go. No major corrections or attention to flubs, I’m to stop chasing technique and perform for a pretend audience.

And I’m supposed to enjoy it.

So how am I doing?

The week got off to a good start. As a Type A hypercompetitive control freak, I set a daily practice schedule allowing ten minutes per dance. Within that timeframe, only three minutes would visit technique; the remaining 7 would be entirely devoted to vamping it up with the mirror, doorframe, and random accessories like potted plants. Not exactly the coach’s advice, but it was all the control I was willing to yield.

Then the heat list came out.

Like a lab rat at a cheese-dispenser, I wasted an ungodly amount of time hunched over my computer surveying the competition. After comparing my previous scores to theirs, I checked which judges are attending, who has marked me well in the past, and who hasn’t.

None of this information makes me dance any better, but that didn’t deter me from trying to predict the future. It also didn’t prevent my upper back from cramping (or keep me from repeatedly calling my teacher on his day off).

So off I went for a massage—another cluster of time I did not devote to dancing. A rubdown, I was sure, would eliminate the butterflies and all would be on target once again.

Unfortunately, my nerves were still shot which upset me even more. In order to sleep that night, I opted for a little self-medication, completely ignoring my “no wine while training” rule.

This made me dehydrated and wakeful.

Dragging myself from bed the next morning, a slow start seemed like a good idea. It began in a chair…at my computer.

And so goes my week.

With less time devoted to dancing, more energy focused on things I can do nothing about, and Nationals set to begin Monday, I can honestly tell Giacomo I’ve achieved full stupidity.

Not exactly his vision, but stupidity nonetheless.